Domestic Tuesdays - A Confession

I have a confession to make. I'm hoping this won't change your opinion of me, and I'd hate to alienate any of you, but I feel like I'd be deceiving you if I didn't admit this. *Deep breath* Okay, the thing is? I don't hate Rachel Ray. *whew!* That felt so good to get off my chest! I know I'm in the minority here, but I've never been the kinda girl to adhere to social norms. I'm a rebel, I guess. I'd never follow along with a popular opinion just to fit in. I'm not saying I'm a hero, but if that's what you want to call it, who am I to stop you?

Yes, I do think she's gotten increasingly annoying in recent years, but I remember a time, back when 30 Minute Meals was in its infancy, when she reminded me of a babysitter you would have begged for. One that actually made you glad your mother was going on yet-another fucking date, and who knew not to stir your goddamn "fruit at the bottom" yogurt before giving it to you because that was your favorite thing to do.

Moving on. Also, as someone who was new to cooking, someone who had once accidentally used olive oil when baking cookies and had yet to master the delicate art of not-burnt grilled cheese sandwiches, Miss Ray's simple recipes and perky attitude helped me overcome my fear of cooking to become what I am today: a semi-competent cook.

Oh, and also? This chili.

I've been making this chili for years now. Being a Rachel Ray recipe, it has a stupid name, but it's by far the best chili I've ever had. There isn't any meat in it, but I'm a dedicated carnivore and I've never missed it. I usually make a batch to last me the week, and by the end of said week, after having eaten it for lunch and dinner five days straight, I never want to see this chili again.

But then, much like dating musicians, a couple months later you forget why you ever swore it off in the first place. It's also incredibly cheap, which I'm sure can somehow be incorporated into that "dating musicians" comparison, but I'm not going there cause I've got class, if you can believe it.

Starting with chopped garlic, a jalapeno, a medium onion, and a red and green bell pepper. Once I used only green bell peppers because they cost like half as much as red ones, but it didn't taste as good. The ethnic market down the street from my new apartment sells the red for super cheap though, so Vons can SUCK IT!

I've heard that whether or not you have a bad reaction when cutting onions is hereditary (can someone back me up here?). If that's the case, then it makes sense that both my mom and I turn into bright red, sobby messes when we get near an onion that's even got a slight paper cut. Slicing the onion as quickly as possible is a good way to avoid, or at least attempt to avoid this. What works for me is slicing off the non-root end, and then slicing down the middle (above).

Next, lay one half on its side, and slice all the way through from root to the cut end.

Finally, cut diagonally across those long slices that you just made and, voila!, a chopped onion! Once I slice both halves, I still usually need some kind of remedy for that horrible, horrible eyeball burn. For me, the thing that works is sticking my head in the freezer and taking some deep breaths through my nose. What works for you?

Alright, so throw all that shit into a deep pot with two tablespoons of olive oil, and let the veggies soften for about five minutes.

Next you're going to add a bunch of things from cans. Kidney beans, black beans, refried beans, crushed tomatoes (the recipe calls from a 32 oz can of tomatoes, but I've never, in my life, found anything but 28 oz cans and it always turns out alright in the end). This time, I added a can of corn, which isn't in the recipe, but I definitely recommend. Next, you can either use a cup of stock or a cup of beer. Guess what I use?

Uhhh, have you met me? I use beer.

You thought I was going to go an entire post without mentioning Trader Joe's, didn't you?? Ha! Fooled you. So chili is great and all, don't get me wrong, but it wouldn't be the same without cornbread. In fact, it would be an abomination without it. I've used cornbread mix from many different brands, but the Trader Joe's cornbread mix should be illegal, it's that freaking good. But it's even better when you add:

a can of diced green chile!!! Better still:

Corn muffins!!!

Yum!

So yeah, the reason I don't hate Rachel Ray is because of this chili, mainly. You can find the original recipe (with its stupid name) here.