I just emailed this to someone (a person who swears he doesn't read this blog, so if he's reading this: "hey liar! xo").
Last night the BFF and I met for a drink at my favorite bar and were promptly hit on by the drunkest, scariest Latino dude in Los Angeles. He sat too-close to me and I could smell his unique mix of cheap booze, stale cigarettes, and sweat. He started telling us about his four kids with four different women, and when BFF politely but firmly told him to leave us alone, he called her a "bitch" and told us about how he was going to rob a bank the following day. He left briefly, during which time we talked about blow jobs and our tits (you know, "girl stuff"), but he promptly returned and informed us that women were evil and didn't know how to love...or something like that.
When he left again, BFF and I gathered our purses and drinks (white Russian for her, Makers/rocks for me), and asked the group of youngish kids next to us if we could pretend we were with them, in hopes that this guy would leave us alone. They were very sweet and it turned out that they were all med students, enjoying a stiff drink after a day of practicing rectal exams on out-of-work actors who needed quick cash and/or enjoyed being violated by nervous students. We quickly became immersed in conversation with them, despite the fact that our intention was merely to talk near them, not with them. One of the young gentlemen was planning on studying infectious diseases, which is a fascination of mine (ask me about the 1918 Spanish Flu!), and a cute girl named Emma and I got in a passionate discussion regarding politics and the shocking lack of brain matter Republicans possessed.
I blasted Pavement on my way home. It was a good night, all things considered.
what did you do last night?
5 comments:
I almost got stabbed by a bank robber too last night! Sigh.
Remember when he told me that I carried too much negativity around me because I asked him to stop talking to us about his violent tendencies and gambling habits? That was awesome.
those exams ARE acting jobs! there's a lot of training and character backgrounds to learn.
love,
your friend,
a former standardized patient who once had 16 abdominal exams in one day, but never ventured into the realm of, um, internal gigs
Poor Paco - he's tried to find love FOUR times, but still no woman has loved him.
I watched a movie and part of a TCM special on Marlon Brando.
The "last night" in question, I saw Daniel Radcliffe naked in Equus.
Yeah, no one who saw that was watching it for artistic value. We just wanted to see how he'd...measure up.
cried because I watched a man have a heart attack earlier in the day
your day sounds better than mine
the rectal exam part of your post made me laugh. thanks!
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