Alright...so obviously Anonymous Blogger*, who wrote the last blog entry, was just one opinion out of very many. And I hope for all us ladies sake that he's the extreme in most of his opinions (read Micah's comment to reassure yourself that some guys are romantics ((Micah is spoken for though, sorry)). Since it's my blog and I don't want people thinking those are my opinions too, I'm going to comment on a few things:
The Grooming and Make-up Issue
-I don't know where the hell guys got the idea that women dress themselves "for other women". It could be because women are more likely to notice all the trouble you went to, and compliment you on more specific things than the usual "you look hot" you'll get from a guy. But personally, I dress myself for myself...so I'll feel hot when I go out, which then translates into me being more confident and less of a socially anxious freak. Yes, I think I'm cute, and feeling cute feels really great. Do I feel cute when I wake up in the morning?...no, not in the least (oh the bedhead!!!). Do I feel cute after 45 minutes of primping?...fuck yes.
-I agree with the anonymous commenter that guys who are into girls who are totally shaved, you know, down there** are, well, really creepy. Finding out a guy I like is into that would probably be enough to make me change my mind about him. I think Anonymous Blogger meant that women should be well groomed, not completely shaved...but it's still annoying that guys seem to have no clue how much time and money it takes to be perfectly primped all the fucking time. If I miss my lip wax by a couple days (get over it, assholes...getting our lip waxed is like women farting...we all do it, even if most of us won't admit it) , or don't feel like giving myself razor burn by shaving my stupid armpits everyday...well fuck you! Again, I like to keep myself well groomed so I'll feel better about myself and more confident (even if no one sees it)...and if missing a day or two in the hair removal department is a deal breaker with a guy I'm dating, good riddance (especially considering most guys have questionable-at-best grooming habits themselves).
-As for make-up, it always makes me laugh when guys say they're into the "natural look" because, and back me up here ladies, that "no fuss" look takes just as long and just as many tools to achieve than the made-up look does. Personally, I don't feel dressed up and cute without a thin line of liquid liner above my eye. Everything else is I wear is pretty neutral...but I still use 8 pieces of make-up and 4 different tools to achieve that "neutral" look. I agree with Anonymous Blogger, and appreciate the news flash, that guys don't like when we wear red lipstick (I was also told recently, by a reliable source, that the "smoky eyed" thing looks terrible) When I was in my early 20's, yeah, I wore too much make-up. Like a lot of Anonymous Bloggers qualms (not picking stupid fights, wearing too much make-up, not coming right out and saying what we want/need) these things come with age and maturity.
Which brings me to...
Everything Else
-I think all girls like to think that "if he's right for me, none of this other crap matters",and I agree...to a point. Hell, I've dated and really liked a "laugh clapper", and I fucking HATE when people clap when they laugh! But I've also dated guys who did everything right...and bored the living hell out of me. I think the whole point of dating is not to find the freaking love of your life, but to see what works and what doesn't, so that when you do find someone who's worthwhile, you won't fuck it up by making a rookie mistake before they have a chance to find out what an effing gem you are. Let's face it, no matter how much a person is right for you and you're right for them, you both have to prove it to each other...and that means getting passed the "he opened the car door for me and showed up on time", and "she didn't talk about her ex all night and her eyebrows are perfectly plucked" so you can concentrate on the stuff that matters.
*For the record, Anonymous Blogger is a really nice guy, despite what you may think after reading his post...he's also a total fox, if that makes any difference.
**my dad reads this, btw.
3 comments:
Thanks for setting the record straight. I was starting to get depressed after the last entry. I guess it's good to know what the other sex is actually thinking every once in a while, but if I spent too much time trying to conform to those stringent criteria I think I'd develop a complex. You know, like more than my usual one.
Yes, his entry bummed me out more than I would have liked it to.
Men who take a fatherly approach to dating (enforcing make-up application, giving count-to-three ultimatums, discouraging women from bringing up topics of conflict) are pretty much boner-killers.
I agree that fighting truly sucks, but what what he seems to lack is the psychological understanding that most relationship conflicts arise out of one person's insecurities needing to be addressed and assuaged.
Oh well. Dating is thorny. But nice rebuttles, G.
Poor Mr. Anonymous. I thought his post was funny, if not a wee bit enlightening. Granted, I am married and the whole dating thing doesn't pertain to me. Though I did make sure to shave well this morning, and not cake my zits with make up :) Thanks for the reminder!
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